SPAM: the South Pacific Association of Marketing

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Don't fight SPAM, fight with it!

You have probably seen an increase in the amount of unsolicited advertising which shows up in your email. More and more people are taking advantage of direct marketing opportunities on the Internet. The South Pacific Association of Marketing (SPAM) has been actively engaged in promoting itself for years. This website is one of the few culturally- safe pro-SPAM places on the web. Help fight for SPAM and with SPAM to keep the Internet profitable.

The aims of the South Pacific Association of Marketing are to
  • grow the reach of SPAM outside the South Pacific region

  • defend every netizen's right to receive SPAM emails uncensored by ISPs, governments and employers

  • reduce the amount of business "chatter" on the Internet which threatens to crowd out and dilute legitimate SPAM marketing messages

  • lobby against anti-SPAM legislation

  • assist SPAM's members (aka "spammers") in their promotion of pyramid schemes, chain letters, quasi-legal services, homeopathic products, magnetic bracelets, investment opportunities, cable TV descramblers etc

  • offer awards, prizes and scholarships for the development of harvesting software, fake anti-SPAM sites, spyware and keystroke loggers

  • hold seminars for spammers on testimonial concoction, quotation writing, and creative subject line ch@r@cter rep1aceme^t


Tip of the Month: Email List Validation
The best way to think about email list validation is in terms of <<your message here>> and return rates. Compare two lists - one is a mere 1000 addresses, all 100% validated, and the second is a whopping 2,000,000,000 addresses, but it's 50% dirty. If you e-mail to each list and get the same percent return on good addresses, that juicy two billion address list will give you an incredible 1,000,000 (One Thousand Thousand) times more actual return than the so-called "clean" list! That's a big difference!!


FAQ
  1. Is SPAM protected by Free Speech laws?
    Yes. Free speech guarantees you the right to say what you want, a medium to make yourself heard in and a Marketing Association to lobby and mailbomb for it. In most countries there are strong explicit protections for commerce and marketing.
  2. Is blocking SPAM censorship?
    Yes. Censorship is blocking information based on its content. SPAM-blocking prevents many harmless yet informative SPAM emails from reaching their intended recipients. It is censorship to try to restrict SPAM messages on the Internet. We're up against some pretty large anti-business interests here
  3. Does SPAM use the same techniques as traditional paper ("junk" mail) advertising and telemarketing?
    No. SPAM only uses efficient, modern, paperless methods (the Internet) to distribute materials: at the convenience of the sender and the expense of the recipient! SPAM is very cost effective
  4. Is SPAM legal?
    You bet. With the explosive growth of the Internet, SPAM has moved much faster than the laws, or the nolledge of the people who are supposed to enforce them. For example, most people at the Antipodes Islands FCC, which has jurisdiction over South Pacific junk faxes, don't even know what SPAM is, let alone how the laws they enforce apply to it.
  5. Are you sure SPAM is legal?
    Weeeell, everything not explicitly illegal is permitted. Until a legislature passes a law or a court makes a decision, it's legal. Most people want as little government interference in the Internet as possible. And if the South Pacific passes laws against SPAM, we'll up and move to Spain & Portugal, Suriname & Panama etc.
  6. What happens now?
    This message has been sent to your computer screen for good luck. The original is in the Antipodes Islands. Email copies to 20 people you think need good luck. Do not keep this message. This message must leave your hands in 96 hours.